Lunchgate: When Parenting Feels Like a Battle (And How to Reconnect)

We opened The Village this week.

Here I am, ready to support you to become the parent you know you want to be.

I just hope my phone wasn't recording at 7.52am on day 2 of The Village opening.

Why? Because I was arguing with my 7-year-old about why he couldn't have a packed lunch.

Now for context: Matthew never has a packed lunch. I'm not a packed lunch kind of mum. I've made peace with that. (Or Piece. Ha. No pun intended.)

Yet at 7.52am, he decided today was the day.

And of course, today was also the day where a packed lunch would have included 2 bits of stale bread, a cracker, and a pack of Haribo. And I didn't fancy being THAT mum either.

So our day started with a slightly fraught explanation of why this wasn't going to work today but was a great idea for tomorrow.

But he didn't want it tomorrow. He wanted it today.

And even though I just gave a whole free talk about how in these moments, the most powerful thing to do is witness without letting it derail the day...

I went to full derail mode.

It derailed him. It derailed me. It derailed our schedule.

And we arrived at school a little fraught, quite grumpy, but packed lunch free.

Maybe your version isn't packed lunches.

Maybe it's bedtime struggles. Or screen time negotiations. Or the fact that you asked your child to brush their teeth and somehow ended up in a full-blown negotiation about the meaning of life.

The thing is, these moments don't just derail the morning. They derail US. We lose connection with our kids. We lose connection with ourselves. And we end up feeling like we're failing at the one thing we care most about.

So why am I sharing my packed lunch confessions?

Because that's the point of being in community.

To say, "Hey, listen to this utterly unhinged thing I did today," and have 3 people reply saying, "I hear you... and I can top you!"

Then we laugh. Shake it off. And someone gently reminds you: "You're not failing. You're human. And tomorrow you get to try again."

That's what happens in The Village.

It's not a place where I tell you how to do it perfectly. It's a place where we bring the mess, witness each other, and figure out—together—how to stay connected to our kids (and ourselves) even when everything feels hard.

March's theme is CONNECTION.

The golden thread of the parent-child relationship. How to repair it when it breaks. How to protect it when life gets chaotic. How to come back to it when you've lost your way.

If you're tired of feeling disconnected from your child (or from the parent you wanted to be), this is your month.

👉 Join the waiting list here. Next intake is March 1st.

Love,

Fiona

P.S. Matthew got his packed lunch the next day. It included a yoghurt, some grapes, and exactly one Haribo. We're calling it a win.